Q&A 5

by Amy Konecny
on March 19, 2015
with 0 comments

Question 11:   Do you have any more stories about Ninjas and Chickens?
Answer 11:   Yes quite a few.  For example did you know there are actually 4 types of chickens?  The differences are as great in some cases as the Blue Whale and Hippopotamus.  Now you might ask “Wouldn't that mean that they are different specie?”.   However genitally speaking the hippo is the closet relative to the whale.   Crazy hu?

Question 12:   Would you tell me more about Ninjas and Chickens?
Answer 12:   I would be happy to, but maybe we can keep this line of questing for a different Q&A session and go back to the more getting to know you kind of questions.

Q.  Fair enough.

Question 13?:   Are you in shape?
Answer 13:   Yes, round is a shape.

Q.  Ugg.  (bangs head on table) back to the sass I see

Question 13 Revised:  Do you work out, exorcize, or do anything at all to say in shape?
Answer:  I stretch regularly and do some weight training so I don't hurt myself when I'm setting up or taking down my booth and when the weather is nice I walk, but if I had to run for my life I would probably die.

Q.   Well that was honest.
A.  It's not like I can tell you all I'm a swimsuit model when you can easily find me at a show.   Well OK I could tell you that because I am awesome and sexy, but I'm not the shape that the boring people in fashion are looking for. (sigh)

Question 14:   Do you have a hobby?
Answer 14:   Yes.   My hobby is fixing, painting and repurposing old furniture.   Look here is a picture of an old piano bench I turned into a side table.



A.   (Pulls out phone) Would you like to see some of the other things I've done?
…..... 30 minutes later.....
Q.   Why did I ask that question? (mumble) It's like asking someone about their kids or pets.
A.   Oh pet's I have cat pictures too. Want to see? (looks way to happy)
Q.   No that's alright we still need to get the Q&A over.
A.   (face falls) ok

Question 15:   You said in the introduction that you work 90 hours a week. Is that true? If so how do you have time to have a hobby?
Answer 15:   Yes it is true, however it's more of an average than a strait forward ever week sort of thing.  During the months of October, November, and half of December I will work 110 hours in a week.  However in January and July I might only work 40 hours in a week.  I give myself about 2 weeks a year; usually in December, to just sit at home and stare at the walls, do other craft projects, or bake.  During my shorter work weeks I will work on furniture or some other project.  The rest of the year I will do small craft projects that don't take up much time, but allow me to express my creativity in a new or different way.  Or I'll have a large project that I can do in small bites of time.



The Bet Between the God's

by Amy Konecny
on March 16, 2015
with 0 comments

As you know Gods have a lot of time on their hands.  After the whole creations business was over there was not much to do other than sit around watching their followers and playing lots of games.  Oh and betting on everything imaginable.  This is the bet that turned the God of Ninja's and the God of Chicken's against each other.  (all the gods will be called by there less formal title from here on)
One day a giant turtle ate the sun (Giant turtles love eating stars since they are shiny and it will keep them warm as they swim around in space).  This was more common that you would think back then so instead of charging forth together and making the turtle throw-up the sun like they normally did, they decided this time to turn it into a game.  The first one to get the sun out of the turtle wins, the winner would get to decide how many hours of daylight there would be and how much night. Four gods went out to collect the sun.  The Crocodile god would have it sunny most of the day since she liked to sunbath. The Chicken God and Dragon God like equal amounts of light and dark since it's hard to sleep with the sun up, but you stub your toes a lot if you try to work in the dark and crops don't grow so well without the light.  The Ninja God as you might expect wanted it dark for most of the day since that's when you can be most sneaky.
Each of the contestants where given a pair of tongs to grab the sun and a shield to protect them from the heat.  And they went off to try to collect the sun each trying to come up with a cleaver way to get the sun out of the turtle on their own.   All except the Ninja God he came up with a way to steal the sun from the one that got it out of the turtle or better yet keep them from collecting the sun at all, since the more night the better in his opinion.
The turtle lived on a great big world far away under a mountain full of lava caves and passageways.  (“Wait” you say “How can a turtle large enough to eat a sun live on a planet much less under one of the planet's mountains?”.  Well it's a really BIG planet and this is during a time that science dose not hold sway like today, so just go with it).   When they finally got to the turtles mountain.  The Ninja God tricked the Crocodile God to warming up by a nice pool of lava knowing that when Crocodile gets warm he would become lazy and fall asleep.   Next he showed the Dragon God a cave that was full of gold.   As you know Dragons LOVE gold more than just about anything so the Ninja God said “it will not take you much time to collect some of the gold to take home then you can continue on to get the sun”.  Since the Dragon God was greedy she let herself be talked into collecting some of the gold. While her back was turned the Ninja God sealed the mouth of the cave trapping the Dragon God inside.   Sealing the cave mouth was not as cleaver a plan as the Ninja God thought since the Dragon God can breath fire and simply melt the rock out of her way.   However the gold was a good enough distraction to keep her out of the game.   Then only the Chicken God was left.
He found the Chicken God talking to the Turtle.  She was trying to convenience the Turtle through words alone to give back the sun.   While she was distracted the Ninja God stole her shield and tongs thinking that no one would be foolish enough to pick up the sun without protection.   When he came back from disposing of the items he found that the turtle had thrown-up the sun and that the Chicken God was binding down to pick up the sun in her bare hands.   He had forgotten or perhaps never understood that the Chicken God so loved her her people that she would suffer much for them.  As she picked up the sun the heat was so strong that it burned her lovely feathers off, but she continued holding it and started to head back home. The Ninja God ran up to her and said “Wow you've gotten the sun back, but oh look the heat has burned your feathers off.   I still have my tongs and shield why don't you let me carry it.”, but knowing that the Ninja God was a trickster and should not be trusted said no and continued on her way. Until she got to narrow ledge.  The ledge was just to narrow for her to safely cross while holding the sun.  The Ninja God once more offered to help but this time instead of offering to take the sun he suggested tying a rope around her waist.  He would go to the other side of the gap, when he got there she would jump off ,swing out and over and he would simply pull her up on the other side.  Because the Chicken God could not think of another way without putting the sun down she agreed to the plan.  They tied the rope around her waist, she jumped off the ledge and he pulled her up. All was going according to plan to her great surprise.   Just before she got to the top the Ninja God exclaimed “hay what's that” pointing off in the distance.  When the Chicken God looked the Ninja God warped some of the extra rope around her neck and stole the sun leaving the Chicken God dangling in the cave.  Don't worry I know it sound bad and it was, but not as bad as you might think since you can't kill a god that way.
For a while the world only had light one hour a day and night for 23 hours.  However the Dragon God finely noticed that she was trapped in the cave and her anger at the Ninja God was temporarily more powerful than her love of gold.  She melted the stone at the mouth of the cave and stormed off to find the turtle and hopefully the Ninja God.  Before she got to the Turtles layer she found the Chicken God just hanging around.  The Dragon God pulled the Chicken God up and discovered what the Ninja God had dune.  On their way back home they found the Crocodile God still asleep by the pool of lava.   All three gods raced back home to confront the Ninja God.  When the other Gods herd the real story of what happened; knowing that the Chicken God never lied and the Ninja God lies, cheats and steals as often as he breathes there was no question in anyone's mind on who was telling the truth.  So they declared the Chicken God the winner.  The Ninja God ranted and raved called the Chicken God a lair and a cheat and pointed out that even if it was all true he was still the one to come back with the sun. However since the goal was to get the sun from the turtle not who could bring it back the Chicken God was clearly the winner.
From that day forward the Chicken God had kept an eye on the Ninja God and prevented him from getting up to any truly harmful mischief.  She also called upon her followers to prevent the followers of the Ninja God from harming others were they where able.  Because she is a benevolent god she also said that the followers of the Ninja God could be redeemed and if it was possible to set them on the path of good then they should do so.
This is a very important story in the Chickens religion since it explains 2 of their beliefs.
1. Why ninjas should not be trusted
2. Why the plucked and hung chicken is an emblem of their god (the other one being the great egg, it's said that the Chicken God laid an egg and the whole world was hatched from it If you are wondering where the rubber part comes in.  Well that is quite simple until recently rubber was very hard to come by so it was a precious material and most appropriate to use for their religious icon.   As a bonus it was light wight (compared to metal or stone) and would withstand lots of abuse witch made it ideal for chickens.




by Amy Konecny
on March 12, 2015
with 0 comments

Question 9: Did you say that in your universe Ninjas and Chickens are Mortal Enemy's? (look of confusion)
Answer 9: Yes.    Before you glare at me there is a short answer, a long answer, and a really long answer which would you like?
Q. Lets start with the short answer.
A. Have you ever seen any of the old (1970's) Asian Kung Fu Movies?
Q. No
A. There is a trope in those movies that a ninja sneaking into a building/place will only be tripped up by a chicken that just just happens to flap in his face and they fall over or bump into something or the chicken leave a bit of bird poo in just the wrong place and the ninja falls down.
Q. OK. So what dose that have to do with your universe?
Answer 9 Continued: So in my universe the chickens really do protect the hearth and home from ninjas.  They are not just being annoying birds when the cluck an odd hours, peck your feet, flap around, and live presents on top of your roof.  They are in reality practicing for when the ninja arrives.  People just don't give chicken enough credit. For example people think chickens are so stupid that they will drown in rain.  This is not true. What is really happening is that they are looking around for the ninjas that would use the cover of a storm to sneak in.  They are actually risking their lives for you.
Q. Wow I had no idea that chickens where so cool.
A. Got to respect the chickens. (nodes head)
Question 10: How did this all start? The enmity between Chickens and Ninjas that is. It seams like an unlikely pairing for enemy's.
Answer 10: It all started with a bet.... This is a fairly long story lets take a little brake and I'll tell you the story of the bet.
Q: Works for me.



Q&A 3

by Amy Konecny
on March 05, 2015
with 0 comments

Question 5: You Really don't seam to lack self confidence. Why is that?
Answer 5: I have a saying that I came up with that answers that question perfectly “When God Makes You This Wonderful, Being Modest Is Just Rude” (nodes head sagely).  Oh or the other one that I came up with works too “You Can't Put This Much Sexy Into A Skinny Body”.
Q. I'm not sure how the second one answers the question, but OK
A. What? It's perfect, it means love yourself an all that you are.
Q. Yes, but that just....( sigh)  Never mind I will not get into that with you.  Lets get back to the Q&A
A. OK (smile)
Question 6: I am told that you believe that we all live in our own little universe is that true?
Answer 6: Yes.... (nodes head vigorously)   Oh should I expand on that?


Q. (Glare)


Answer 6 continued: I believe that each person lives in there own universe or dimension.  There is a lot of overlap between these places that's how we can all touch one another and communicate.  However there is always something that works differently in your universe than in someone else. It might be big or small, but it's always there.  This is how conflicts and misunderstandings happen, particularly the kind of conflicts/ misunderstandings that occur because you both think your talking about the something, but in reality your not. It can also effect greatly how you venue the world compared to other people.
Question 7: Give me 2 examples of how your universe differs from most others.
Answer 7: In my universe the word Fondle is a good word and Ninjas and Chickens are mortal enemy's.
Question 8: Did you say fondle was a good word?   (blush)
Answer 8: Yes I tell my customers to fondle my jewelry all the time.  The technical definition of the word fondle is: to touch in a loving and careful way or to receive a large amount of personal pleasure from touching.  Since I would like my customers to both enjoy touching my jewelry and to treat it gently I think it's a perfect word.
Question 8b: Um what about the other meaning?
Answer 8b: Get your mind out of the gutter. Gees. I don't even want to know what your thinking about doing to thous earrings.
Q. What? No! That's not what I meant. (blush furiously)
A. (Falls over laughing) Sorry, sorry just could not help myself.
Q. (Glare) You are a sick and twisted woman.




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